Bradley Jay: ‘Should You Ever Date A Friend’s Ex?’
It’s not too difficult to imagine a situation in which your good friend meets and dates a person you find very attractive, and that during the time they are a couple, you come to feel close to your friend’s mate. Then perhaps they break up and, as the days pass, you remain in communication with your friend’s ex. At some point there may be a temptation to take the next step and get romantically involved with that person.
Of course, you have to consider the feelings of your friend. You wonder, “will my friend be angry with me for dating his/her former partner?’
You may go as far as to actually ask for your friend’s blessing to hook up with his recent paramour. And said friend may even grant permission to proceed, technically absolving you of guilt should you move forward with your plan.
But deep inside you don’t feel quite right because your gut tells you that regardless of what your friend has said, his/her ego will be tested. You wonder, “is this worth it?” On the one hand you want to play it safe and preserve your friendship, but on the other you don’t want excess caution and paranoia to rob you of what could turn out to be the love of your life.
So my question to you is this; ‘Is it ever okay to date a friend’s ex, even though that friend has given you permission?’ Is the upside worth the risk that the whole venture could go south and result in bad blood, a shattered friendship, and maybe even a punch in the nose?