BOSTON (CBS) – What is dumber than a local school principal banning the mere mention of Santa from a second grade “holiday” party?  Or the lighting of a “holiday” tree in the public square by officials and business leaders too timid to call that thing with all of the pretty lights and the star on top what it really is?  Here’s the answer to all of these questions.  It is found in the politically correct nonsense that emanates from the vaunted power brokers of Washington.  Our beloved Congress that begins its workdays (however infrequently workdays for them occur) with a chaplain’s prayer to God Almighty.  It is the same Congress that sanctions, as a national federal “we public servants get a day off from work” holiday (derived from holy day) the 25th of December (for reasons that will hereby remain unmentionable).  Get ready.  It is the same Congress that is hereby forbidden to utter the words, “Merry Christmas” in print.  No Yuletide kidding around here.  Check out these actual congressional mandates on franking (their mailing privileges) that reads more like a news item from The Onion.  But hark, it is all true:


Members are unable at the current time to use official resources to record holiday greetings, post on social media/website, or send to constituents in franked mail or e-communications.

Member’s Congressional Handbook: GREETINGS-

Expenses related to the purchase or distribution of greetings, including holiday celebrations, condolences, and congratulations for personal distinctions (wedding anniversaries, birthdays, etc.), are not reimbursable.”

Franking Manual:

4(a). Example of Nonfrankable Items-Birthday, anniversary, wedding, birth, retirement or condolence messages and holiday greetings are prohibited.”

You may make reference to the season as a whole using language along the lines of ‘Have a safe and happy holiday season.’ It may only be incidental to the piece rather than the primary purpose of the communication.”


No wonder their approval rating is lower than the highest rated MSNBC show.  We now have another big reason why.  The anti-Christmas dictum that has pervaded so much of our landscape comes straight from the lawyers under the dome.  The same solons that send our precious young people off to fight untenable wars, the same paragons of fiscal virtue who have spent this country into oblivion actually spend their precious time outlawing words that any rational human knows are perfectly reasonable.  In fact they are downright pleasant.  Season’s greetings invoke warmth, kindness and peace; those who have a problem with it and any related issues are either hypocritical, hypercritical or both.  Serve them up some heavily spiked eggnog and force them to stand under mistletoe for about a week straight I say.  It might lessen the disease of silliness.  A better solution might just be to throw the lion share of grinches out of office and start over.


To the honorable president, speaker, majority leader and toadies, I hereby utter those words deemed unimportant, incidental and incendiary.  Merry Christmas and to all who don’t like it, a good night.


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