By Michael Hurley, CBS Boston
BOSTON (CBS) — Apparently, America really loves a good beer chug.READ MORE: Gov. Baker Proposes Waiving Massachusetts Sales Tax For All Of August And September
Conversely, America truly hates to see an icy lager move slowly down a famous man’s gullet.
Certainly, America — at least the part of America that spent Thursday night Logged On™ — did not appreciate the pace at which Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers sucked down his frothy brew while sitting courtside at Game 5 of the Bucks-Raptors Eastern Conference finals.
See for yourself in the video above.
Here it is with audio of the crowd:
That Rodgers had to follow beer-chugging extraordinaire David Bakhtiari didn’t help the visual of Rodgers casually sipping his adult beverage. That much is for sure.
Still, the internet went a little bit hard on Rodgers for not tapping into his inner frat boy.
A sampling of the avalanche of headlines that followed:
Sports Illustrated: Aaron Rodgers is Really Bad at Chugging Beer
Yahoo Sports: Aaron Rodgers does not do Wisconsin proud with shameful beer chug at Bucks game
Daily Caller: AARON RODGERS FAILS AT CHUGGING A BEER WHILE MATTHEW STAFFORD CHUGS ONE IN EPIC FASHION
The Washington Post (The Washington Post!): Which was worse: Aaron Rodgers’s beer-chugging debacle or Bucks’ home loss to Raptors?
Kansas City Star: After Aaron Rodgers fumbles chance to chug beer, Matt Stafford shows how it’s done
Fox News (Fox News!): NFL’s Aaron Rodgers trounced by Packers teammate in beer-chugging duelREAD MORE: Treasured Photo Album Returned To Gloucester Bar Made Famous By 'The Perfect Storm'
New York Daily News: Aaron Rodgers is really, really bad at chugging beer
CBS Sports: Aaron Rodgers got completely embarrassed by David Bakhtiari in beer chugging contest at Bucks game
Jeeeeeeeeez, internet! That is a lot of coverage. And it’s a lot of shaming.
Tsk tsk, to you, internet. Perhaps it’s you who must be shamed.
(The BBC was apparently too busy to cover this breaking news story of international significance.)
For one, Rodgers clearly approached this beer-chugging opportunity the same way Kenny Powers approached an offer to jump some rope.
Please. Like I’m going to chug a beer like a little schoolchild. I don’t think so. Get over yourself, dude.
The 35-year-old Rodgers didn’t feel the need to prove his machismo by going toe-to-toe with an offensive lineman in a beer-chugging contest — which frankly is a battle that 99.9 percent of the population is going to lose every time. And so he clearly played up his disadvantage by holding up a finger to the crowd, wincing with his eyes closed, and stopping mid-chug.
It was a work, folks.
(He was identified as a “Game Of Thrones Extra” on the screen, after all.)
So, while, yes, Tom Brady is a candidate for being a GOAT beer chugger, and while yes, Matthew Stafford felt the need to assert his own beer-chugging dominance over an NFC North rival, the reality is that there’s no shame in Rodgers’ inability or unwillingness to put down 16 ounces of beer in a matter of 2 seconds.
Plus, Rodgers is more of a liquor guy anyway.